The News I Can Hardly Bear to Share

When I was looking up the picture I wanted to use for this post, I thought the pain in my heart might kill me. Oh, this is hard. My grandpa, who I made a really great post about a while back and can't find it now, passed away on Wednesday. He's had cancer for years now so I shouldn't be surprised. And we had about a week's notice that it was coming. But nothing can prepare you for the realization that it could be 50 years before you see someone you love so dearly again. I have kept pretty busy since finding out...Maren being sick, packing for a little vacation, vacationing, cleaning, etc. But whenever I stop for just a second, he is always on my mind and the tears flow freely. I can't imagine my life without him and I wish my kids didn't have to spend so much of theirs without him. He loved them and me so much. If you asked anyone who knew him what one stand-out thing was about him, it was that he loved his family. He made it known ALWAYS. There is a huge hole in my heart right now and it saddens me to think of how long it may be there. And then I think about Dallin and realize that it will always be there. I wish that I could've talked to him before he passed and asked him to kiss my grandma for me and to scoop up Dallin and tell him we love him. I'm sure he did that anyway because he would know. But it would sure make me feel better. Michael went into the Missionary Training Center on March 4th. He thought that was pretty cool because he was "marching forth" to fulfill his calling as a missionary. My grandpa died on March 4th. I know that he is "marching forth" to his eternal glory. I fly out to Arizona to attend his funeral on Monday. I'm sure I'll have a lot to say and get off my chest when I get back...